Friday, April 2, 2010

Old Man Yells At Cloud





Our regular feature of an old crank's observations before senility fully sets in.




  • Every manner of human mystery will be solved at some point. It will be 1's and 0's and it will be boring. The journey that is our species' evolution is basically the constant discovery that lightning does not come from Zeus.
  • Tech journalism, if you can call it that, has an Apple fetish
  • What do women want? We don't know, they don't know. Repression is so much easier
  • Did you see Keith Olbermann on Friday when he started reading from James Thurber. His story is starting to resemble Howard Beale's
  • If the "They" say it's cool, people will do it. The trend now seems to be getting younger people to not "own" anything. Examples: downloads over CDs, bank cards over cash, the "cloud" over hard drive. Sure, these things are newer but you cannot do what you want with the "cool" that you can with the "old" stuff
  • Why so many small planes lately and what is that shit they are leaving in the sky?
  • The Simpson's is still the only good satire on network TV
  • Just admit you want to bang Sarah Palin and stop pretending she's a politician worth listening to. Name one new idea that she's ever created
  • That optimistic jobs report included lots of temporary Census positions. Look at the APS Payroll report. It's the most telling. Jobs were lost this month
  • Pay college athletes already
  • You can say the Pope is a crook who let deaf kids get raped and not be anti-Catholic. You can say that the Israeli government commits war crimes and not be anti-Semitic. Sadly, however, you can say those things and still be a bigot. You can never tell where a critic is coming from when you are a religious minority
  • We only ever have two choices in this country. Usually two fake choices but two choices none the less. Coke or Pepsi, Mac or PC. I am convinced that if you said "breathing or kill puppies" a sizable portion of this society would either end up dead or with Snoopy's blood on their hands
  • In the film, Brief Interviews with Hideous Men, there is a quote that is rather deep. "People can see you as a thing....when they see you as a thing, they can do anything they want to you." What's your "thing?"
  • Didn't they do 3D movies in the 50s? What so urgent about having them now
  • Are there any real trends anymore that don't come from Madison Avenue?
  • Sorry, local news, but crime rates just keeps on going down. You're either going to have to scare more or report some news
  • The kids whose schools you cut from now will be the adults later. Most school children now are minorities. Here's a prediction: when these under-educated children become adults and their lack of quality academics in youth end up destroying a future America. How much do you want to bet that very old white people will say, "This country's going downhill because of all the blacks and Hispanics we got now." Place your bets
  • Ya can't get good Italian in southern California. Some would disagree but it's only because the longer you've been deprived of the good East Coast stuff, the more this Californian fusion crap starts tasting acceptable
  • So, liberals, Karzai wants us out and McChrystal says we kill an "amazing number of (unarmed) people." Still pro-surge just because Obama is.
  • Have you seen Groundhog's Day?
  • Unrelated - how about this buildup to an Iran war? It's like 2003 all over again
  • Hack joke that is true: the Federal Reserve is not federal and has no reserves
  • I can't figure out if Donovan McNabb has been a disappointment or the reason for what success the Eagles have had
  • So, we're down to remaking Clash of the Titans now. That's one step away from redoing Go-Bots
  • All men are dogs, all women have fleas

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